Comments on Drew Lee's Toefl Essay #2

     After reading Drew's essay, one question that I always wondered popped out: is it okay to write a 'TOEFL' essay like a novel? I often considered the quote 'TOEFL' as a limitation that hinders me from writing freely, and the one that puts my writing style into a certain format. Therefore, I used to ask people, including friends, my brother, teachers, etc. if it is okay to write like one, but I never got the constant answer. So I just chose my perspective, which is that for 'TOEFL' essay, people should write it like a TOEFL essay, the one with a rigid format.
     This is the first thing I want to point out in Drew's essay. I understand that the topic is not a 'TOEFLish' one, but my personal belief is that the essay should always stay in a limited format. Because writing a Toefl essay is just for preparing for Toefl, I think it would have been better if he wrote in a TOEFLish way, the one without 'us, you, lots of me'... etc. Second of all, I want to point out his thoughts. Though it is indeed a creative thought, I doubted if such thoughts are suitable to the topic, the change in 21st century. For me, the nuance of two things sounded a bit different, and I'm not sure if the topic asked for these thoughts or not.
     On contrast, the good things Drew did was first of all, his creative thoughts as I mentioned. Although it may sound a bit paradoxical, because he drew out the thoughts the topic did not seem to ask, his thoughts approached me very positively. Another thing is that his style was logical. On every results and phenomenons, he wrote why this would happen, and why that is likely to happen. Reading his essay, there was no ambiguous points I wanted to raise questions about.